Saturday, September 29, 2012

In One Month || life

One month has flown by so fast. I'm done my first month of classes. October is just around the corner. I've actually learned so much in the past month and look forward to the rest of the year. We've had some pretty awesome people come to our program and speak. My teachers are phenomenal. I'm really privileged to be under their care. I'm starting to sift through what I enjoy doing and what I know I won't do with photography. 

Every week we have different photographers/editors/teachers come in to speak to us about their work as a photojournalist/photographer. They talk about how they started, what they do now, what they shoot with, advice for the upcoming photographers etc. 

I don't know how many of my readers are photographers, but here are some things I've learned this past month. 

- carry your camera with you all the time. all the time.
- ten years of photographing something may be equivalent to 10 seconds worth of photos (time really is of the essence)
- good things happen when you talk to people
- big logos and watermarks take away from your picture. your style/photography should speak for itself
- prime lenses are your best friends but get to know your body
- hang out with motivated and optimistic people
- elbows in when shooting. 
- keep both eyes open when you shoot. you'll never know what's happening around you. 
- when teachers are critiquing your photos, humbly listen and receive it. excuses don't change your photo
- don't waste your time on regret. you don't gain anything. just do better next time
- look at pictures every day
- have another THING apart from photography otherwise you'll go crazy
- put out work you believe in
- seek answers outside the classroom
- have your camera hanging off your shoulder/around your body with the LENS INWARD not outward. 
- capturing the perfect moment only comes with patience
- think, think, shoot. shoot, think, think, shoot

There's so much more I'm learning as I read blogs and interviews with photographers. My brain is going to explode. I would check out this link posted by Eric Kim Photography. 35 Magnum photographers give advice to aspiring photographers. I'm also reading Image Makers Image Takers by Anne-Celine Jaeger

Tuesday, September 25, 2012

love must be sincere || faith

It's the last week of September. I don't know if time is going by fast or slow. Being back in school is a lot more difficult than I anticipated. When I was in my undergrad I had a lot of restless and sleepless nights. It's starting to happen again as I start to think about my projects and assignments. It's difficult also with photography because I'll go through my head with what I could have and should have done, but you can't rewind your day. You can't go back and find the people you randomly met to redo the shot.

With photojournalism it's all about timing. Am I ready for the possibilities of events that may happen? Am I bold enough to talk to strangers and dig a bit deeper into their lives? Sometimes I wonder what I'm doing, but as soon as I meet people and talk to them I find myself coming alive.

This morning I woke up and read Romans 12. Verse 9 states, "Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good." Is this evident in every area of my life even my classes, my assignments, my projects? Am I giving it all that I am? Am I loving without any boundaries?

I can't do it on my own. I can barely love my friends and family sincerely, how am I supposed to do this with people I barely know, people in my class, and even my teachers that irk me? I'm becoming painfully aware of my inability to do anything without the power and love of my Daddy. I'm drained when I try to love others selflessly. I get hurt when I give and give.

For when I am weak, then I am strong. His grace is sufficient for me and I have no choice but to cling on to this. I feel that I'll be ruined if I live my life without it.

Tuesday, September 18, 2012

youth || poem

taken by Sarah Taylor
Youth is not a time of life; it is a state of mind; it is not a matter of rosy cheeks, red lips and supple knees; it is a matter of the will, a quality of the imagination, a vigor of the emotions; it is the freshness of the deep springs of life.

   Youth means a temperamental predominance of courage over timidity of the appetite, for adventure over the love of ease.  This often exists in a man of sixty more than a body of twenty.  Nobody grows old merely by a number of years.  We grow old by deserting our ideals.

   Years may wrinkle the skin, but to give up enthusiasm wrinkles the soul.  Worry, fear, self-distrust bows the heart and turns the spirit back to dust.

   Whether sixty or sixteen, there is in every human being's heart the lure of wonder, the unfailing child-like appetite of what's next, and the joy of the game of living.  In the center of your heart and my heart there is a wireless station; so long as it receives messages of beauty, hope, cheer, courage and power from men and from the Infinite, so long are you young.

   When the aerials are down, and your spirit is covered with snows of cynicism and the ice of pessimism, then you are grown old, even at twenty, but as long as your aerials are up, to catch the waves of optimism, there is hope you may die young at eighty.

(Youth - Samuel Ullman)

Monday, September 17, 2012

mumford & sons - i will wait || music

Something about this band is so special. I'm not sure if it's the banjo or Marcus Mumford's voice or the lyrics, but they're special. I love this new song that came out. I think it captures my heart and what I'm going through right now. I came home and physically felt heavy. Emotions stirred in me as I drove into Belleville. I was kind of surprised by this. At church we talked about Mary & Martha and the major difference was that Mary sat, rested and listened. She experienced intimacy while Martha was busy. I think it's time for that now.

I have a lot to think about in my mind. This past weekend a lot happened in my heart. As a lot of questions started to become answered more questions arose. I like to have complete pictures nicely framed in my mind. If there are any holes to a situation or picture it makes me feel very unsettled. But that's where trust comes in right? Trusting that even with unanswered questions life is good and I'm going through a process. Sorry for being so vague. I'm also still figuring it out. I'm wondering what I'm doing at photojournalism school, why I'm in the middle of nowhere and why I didn't follow through with some other options. It's not regret. It's just a wonder.

And I came home
Like a stone
And I fell heavy into your arms
These days of dust
Which we've known
Will blow away with this new sun

And I'll kneel down
Wait for now
And I'll kneel down
Know my ground

And I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you

So break my step
And relent
You forgave and I won't forget
Know what we've seen
And him with less
Now in some way
Shake the excess

But I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you

So I'll be bold
As well as strong
And use my head alongside my heart
So take my flesh
And fix my eyes
That tethered mind free from the lies

But I'll kneel down
Wait for now
I'll kneel down
Know my ground

Raise my hands
Paint my spirit gold
And bow my head
Keep my heart slow

Cause I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you
And I will wait, I will wait for you

Tuesday, September 11, 2012

delete and be free || life

When I was leaving Korea a lot of people said that I was easy to shop for because the things I love are so evident. I love music, I love being crafty (in a good way hehe) and I love photography & design. Without giving it any thought having music and access to photoshop & lightroom was so easy as if it were my right. I guess I thought I was entitled to have easy access to the things that would make my life great. You can download these things for free on the internet. Why would I not take advantage of this? So I have more than 6,000 songs plus I'm sure another couple thousand saved somewhere on CDs & harddrives. Most weren't bought or legally downloaded (will I get in trouble for admitting this online? I hope not!) 

I had my reasons to justify this! When I was a senior in college my car was stolen. In that car were all my CDs! I used to be an avid CD buyer and I loved supporting artists with buying their merch. After they were stolen, I became bitter and jaded. I reasoned that there was no need to buy material things when they'd easily get taken away from you. I also reasoned that if I downloaded I wouldn't be supporting corporations and big music companies. I thought those were good enough reasons to keep downloading. Stupid... I know, but when you're in university you think you know everything. 

I've never felt convicted to delete and throw away all that the things that I unrightfully owned. It was normal living for me. As I read Romans 2, I got convicted. I long to live a life of integrity and honor. I want to be free of anything that is going to hinder me now and in the future. Even if I don't like big corporations, I realize fighting a wrong with a wrong never solves the problem. If I pursue a life of integrity and holiness, with some supernatural help, I know my slate is clear. Does that make sense? I am free of anything impure, making my soul and spirit free. I'll be able to experience a new kind of freedom I haven't experienced yet.

I'm starting to see the value in making sure I live right before I even try to help others to live right. Whether it's a small issue or a big issue, my heart, mind and spirit need to be aligned with the ways of heaven. I share because I want to be held accountable.

Wish me luck. It'll be done by today. Unless I'm at school with the nice new mac computers I won't have access to photoshop or lightroom for a while. 

*update* only 800 songs survived and no more adobe creative suite is left. it was pretty painful at first, but i know it was good. 

Friday, September 7, 2012

one week finished || life

credit: Sarah Vissers
My first week in Belleville has come to an end. It's early morning before my class starts. I have one class at 9am, and then I'm off home to Waterloo to pick up Clara from where we leave for Toledo, OH. Yep, I'm off to America once again. It's my second home. We're off to do some planning for a end-of-the-year retreat. I like going home on the weekends even if it is a bit costly. That's why I opted for cheap housing instead of living in the dorms. Plus cameras + lenses + random equipment costs SO much!

It's been a really good week. I've met a lot of new people and got some insight as to what my program will be like. The school is alright, but the program seems to be legit. I guess I was worried about what I was getting myself into. When I came to visit Belleville in July I second guessed my decision and thought "I should drop out!" 

Not sure what the rest of the year will be like, but if it's as easy and simple as my Photoshop class then I'll be happy!

Monday, September 3, 2012

Time of Transition || life

I've moved in to my new place in Belleville. It's a bit of a weird situation since I'm all alone. Luckily I'm an introvert so this isn't too much of a problem. Since I'm avoiding unpacking and organizing my room, I decided to edit a few photos from a wedding my sister and I did last night.

Although I always loved looking at wedding photos, after my first one I didn't think I'd ever do one. I'm still so new at it so the stress of making sure I get everything can be overwhelming at times. But yesterday was a ton of fun. Josh and Katie were amazing to work with. They're so much fun and will do anything to make sure everyone around them is having a good time. It was a great way to end my summer. It was an honour to be part of their wedding and it definitely gave me confident for the next one! Photos to come soon!

As most of you know I'm here in Belleville for photojournalism. It's a 2 year college diploma program. I've questioned many times why I ended up coming here and what the whole purpose of this transition is. I know it has to do more than school so I'm excited about that. Life has to be more than about photography and going to school and having a career. I don't want to limit my opportunities and the big or little doors that I will come across.

As the days approached to today I felt that I needed to be open to whatever may happen. There's a bigger purpose to why I'm here on my own.

Times of transition are normally difficult, but for once I'm not feeling anxious or regretful of this decision. I'm so blessed to be covered with prayers of so many wonderful people. Here we go. It's a time of transition, but really all things are the way they're supposed to be.

By the way, this is a question for my regular commenters. Do you prefer if I e-mail you a response or should I just reply on the blog. I'm not sure if you get the reply if I reply to you on the blog, so let me know! And if I don't reply directly please know that I'm VERY blessed and am always doing my best to keep up to date with your blog and your life if it's possible! This blog is always in transition and you're awesome for supporting me so much!