Tuesday, September 11, 2012

delete and be free || life

When I was leaving Korea a lot of people said that I was easy to shop for because the things I love are so evident. I love music, I love being crafty (in a good way hehe) and I love photography & design. Without giving it any thought having music and access to photoshop & lightroom was so easy as if it were my right. I guess I thought I was entitled to have easy access to the things that would make my life great. You can download these things for free on the internet. Why would I not take advantage of this? So I have more than 6,000 songs plus I'm sure another couple thousand saved somewhere on CDs & harddrives. Most weren't bought or legally downloaded (will I get in trouble for admitting this online? I hope not!) 

I had my reasons to justify this! When I was a senior in college my car was stolen. In that car were all my CDs! I used to be an avid CD buyer and I loved supporting artists with buying their merch. After they were stolen, I became bitter and jaded. I reasoned that there was no need to buy material things when they'd easily get taken away from you. I also reasoned that if I downloaded I wouldn't be supporting corporations and big music companies. I thought those were good enough reasons to keep downloading. Stupid... I know, but when you're in university you think you know everything. 

I've never felt convicted to delete and throw away all that the things that I unrightfully owned. It was normal living for me. As I read Romans 2, I got convicted. I long to live a life of integrity and honor. I want to be free of anything that is going to hinder me now and in the future. Even if I don't like big corporations, I realize fighting a wrong with a wrong never solves the problem. If I pursue a life of integrity and holiness, with some supernatural help, I know my slate is clear. Does that make sense? I am free of anything impure, making my soul and spirit free. I'll be able to experience a new kind of freedom I haven't experienced yet.

I'm starting to see the value in making sure I live right before I even try to help others to live right. Whether it's a small issue or a big issue, my heart, mind and spirit need to be aligned with the ways of heaven. I share because I want to be held accountable.

Wish me luck. It'll be done by today. Unless I'm at school with the nice new mac computers I won't have access to photoshop or lightroom for a while. 

*update* only 800 songs survived and no more adobe creative suite is left. it was pretty painful at first, but i know it was good. 


  1. I saw your status on Facebook, and it's so ironic because Mark & I have felt the same conviction too. We just read a book about stewarding money, and it said that in order to truly steward God's money, we need to live honorably and with integrity. So immediately, music and computer programs came to mind :-/ We'll be doing the same too. Thank you for your honesty! Love you!

  2. Hi Hannah! I use the canon f1.8 II for all my photos. Really cheap but with yummy bokeh, haha. I need to clear up my iTunes too, it's full of songs i don't even listen to anymore..

  3. I am so proud of you.

    And lightroom is only $80 when you are a student ^^ You just need to send in a copy of your transcript or something for proof.


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