It's been about a week and a half since I've been home. In Seoul I was working every day, then on the weekend I'd either have a photo club meeting, be at church meeting or go on some random adventure. Arriving in Waterloo I was confronted with the sobering reality of unemployment. While working in Korea I was so excited for a break and now that I got it I didn't like it. I felt useless and often wondered what I was doing back in Canada where instead I could have been working and hanging out with my friends.
I had to remind myself to relax. I had to be ok with boredom. Being in limbo is new and scary, but I had to come to terms with it. I put so much of my value and worth in everything I did that as soon as it was all gone I didn't know what to do with myself. When we're so busy we want to relax and when we have a lot of down time we wish for an adventure. Our hearts are never satisfied with where we are. I can fully attest to this. I have wander lust, I'm always restless and even when I get what I want I'm still never satisfied.
These times of rest are so rare so I need to appreciate it. It's ok to be bored. During these times I can spend sweet, intimate times with the Lord, catch up with old friends, draw & paint, read what I want, and rest.
In your week don't forget to stop. relax and be bored.
Psalm 46:10
Be still, and know that I am God.
not even joking hannah, but i was feeling the EXACT same way. I was even thinking of getting a job right away when i got back, but like you wrote in this post, its okay to relax and be bored.
ReplyDeleteAnyways, I hope you're boredom is just as great as mine :)
it's so good to know that i wasn't the only one feeling like this. this boredom isn't so bad once you get used to it :)
DeleteFirst of all, I never knew what "wander lust" meant until this post...thank you for using it in a way that I understand haha. Second, this boredom will be your resting place when things get crazy again, so cherish it and make sure to put it in a very special place in your heart. Then, when life gets hectic, you can revisit this place of rest again and again.
ReplyDeleteThirdly, I miss you.
I don't even know if I used the term properly, but I've been told that I have it :)
DeleteI think you're right. I need to get comfortable with this so that when I happen to stumble across boredom I'll know what to do.
and Liz, I miss you a lot. a lot a lot!